Obituary of David Nicholas Stuffler

 

LOVE OF MY LIFE

 

                David Nicholas Stuffler that older man of 15 captured my heart at 14.  Love at first sight does exist.  My love was tall, dark and handsome.  Together for 63 years, we married on July 8, 1967 and chose not to have children.  As time passed, there was so much more to learn about the love of my life.  He was the most kind and gentle soul with an infinite ability to love.  But there was more.  His nature was giving, sincere, and light-hearted.  Whether it was his PMS joke or the song as he stirred his coffee and tapped the spoon on the edge of his cup, he took after his father Frank with an easy-going personality.  He had special gifts of unique insights and perceptions, complex mechanic ability, and with his sense of humor he was able to make people laugh.

 

                On his father’s birthday St. Patrick’s Day Sunday March 17^th, 2024, at 78 his spirit was released from his tormented brain and Lewy Body Dementia battered shell of a body.   He fought hard against this terminal disease, but welcomed death to end his mental and physical torture.  Returning from an African cruise one week earlier, the struggle was too much for him.

 

                Dave was misdiagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease 7 years ago.  He never believed that he had Parkinson’s and he was correct.  July 2023 doctors at UNM Medical Center correctly diagnosed him with Lewy Body Dementia.  His prognosis was from 3 weeks to 3 years to live.  He lasted 7 months and was fighting until he gave up and wanted a bullet.  Thankfully our Orange County doctor talked him out of suicide and later he entered hospice care.  His last hours were spent trying to breathe despite significant fluid build-up in his lungs.  But he was medicated at home in our living room where his ashes remain today.

 

                Lewy Body Dementia affects only 1.4 million out of our estimated 350 million residents which is 0.4% of the US population.  How unlucky could Dave be?  Yes, he had 78 years while his mother made it to 77 and his dad made it to 82.  His disease included hallucinations, anxiety, depression, loss of olfactory sense, inability to speak clearly, loss of memory, indecisiveness, body aches and pains, stiffness and pain in his legs and feet, shuffling and difficulty walking, loss of strength and dexterity, micro handwriting, frustration, prostate problems, and many falls.  He needed help getting in and out of bed, getting out of his recliner, and with buttons and snaps.  His falls were a result of Orthostatic Hypotension which is a drop in blood pressure upon rising.  Dizziness and lightheadedness were his constant companion.  It was not uncommon for us to fall in a heap together when my support failed.  He took nearly 30 pills per day with 8 of those to control the low blood pressure which helped little. 

 

                A Navy brat, Dave grew up in PB (Pacific Beach) San Diego and went to St. Brigid’s School.  Later his family moved to Santa Ana where he attended St. Joseph’s School, Santa Ana High School and Santa Ana College as an engineering and aviation major.  His dyslexia created challenges with textbook learning and color-blindness crushed his desire to work for the commercial airlines as an aviation mechanic.  He loved cars, speed, and competed in races at Orange County (OC) and Pomona Raceways.  He told stories about the early NHRA drag races on the Orange County Airport runways in between flights. 

 

                In September 1965 after a night of drinking, Dave and his buddies enlisted in the US Navy Reserves.  Serving as an aviation machinist, he was stationed at Long Beach, Los Alamitos, and Lemoore Naval Air Stations.  His first civilian job was as a mechanic at Dunton Ford, later he opened a Chevron Station at the corner of Main and MacArthur in Santa Ana.  Owning two Panteras, he specialized in high performance sports cars.  Later he became an independent Snap-On Tool Dealer, then with new automotive technology, he became an employee at Snap-On Tools as a Technical Representative both selling and training on computerized diagnostic equipment.  He and a partner wrote a business computer program for the Snap-On Tool Dealers. 

 

                His passion was building, creating and travel.  Whether it was building and designing a patio cover or a pool table room or a waterfall or software for Snap on tool dealers, he enjoyed the work and the satisfaction it provided.  Dave treasured each of his career professions because he was a social being who enjoyed talking and laughing with people.  An average work week for Dave lasted from 70 hours or more; he worked hard to provide for our comfort.  When he had his first angioplasty and then his second with 3 stents, he decided to take an early retirement at 50. 

 

                Following our life’s quest of travel, we visited 166 countries with multiple visits to at least half of those countries.  Dave most enjoyed Africa with safaris, meeting the locals and experiencing the different lifestyles and cultures, and interacting with the children in small villages.  He would trade our soccer balls with the kids’ plastic bag balls held together with twine.  We also spent countless hours in Maui hiking, running, swimming, snorkeling, and Dave diving at Old Airport Beach.  He loved the water.   The joy he received from travel was a highlight of his life. 

               

                He had several last wishes like having friends visit our home, building new deer feeders, and seeing his beloved elephants in Africa.  Sadly, none of these came pass, but his wish for death was fulfilled.

 

                Dave’s favorite charity is the David Sheldrick Wildlife Trust in Nairobi Kenya https://www.sheldrickwildlifetrust.org/ where they rescue orphaned elephants, provide each with a caretaker 24/7, and gradually reintroduce them as a group back into the wild.

 

David, you are the love of my life and I hold you close within me with love for you forever.

 

Martha